Wife: I am asking for so long what is your biggest tension in life and you are just looking at me.

A screenwriter returned home to a devastating scene – his house engulfed in flames. His wife, amidst tears and coughs, recounted the ordeal outside the charred remains. "Oh my goodness, it was a nightmare! I was cooking when your agent rang about your script. I didn't even see the fire until it was too late – everything just went up in smoke! We even lost Fluffy..." The writer interrupted, incredulous, "Wait a second, my agent called you directly? Seriously?"

My ego has this confusion. It believed the weight of the universe rests on its bending shoulders.

A linguistics professor stood before his English class, enlightening them on the peculiarities of language. "Remember, in English," he said, "a double negative becomes a positive. But in other languages, like Russian, a double negative remains negative. Surprisingly, there's no language where a double positive turns negative." A mischievous voice from the back chimed in, "Sure, sure."

She came late. She took her veil and looked at my grave. I don’t know whose fate was better line or my grave.