"Can I call someone to pick you up?" the officer offered. She hiccupped and said, "Call Batman, maybe he can give me a lift in the Batmobile!"
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As the police officer approached the slurring man, he asked, "Sir, have you been drinking?" The man replied, "Why, officer, is there a cocktail party nearby?"
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The police officer said to the drunk jaywalker, "Why did you cross the road?" The drunk replied, "To get to the other pub, officer!"
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John tried to give a breathalyzer test to a lamppost, convinced it was a police officer on patrol. The lamppost didn't blow, but John sure did!
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The officer tried to guide a drunk woman, saying, "Walk in a straight line, please." She replied, "Oh, I'm more of a 'zigzag' enthusiast, officer!"
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